We are in the process of moving. We have been in this process for about 3 months now. We moved into the current house 5 years ago, when we only had 2 children. Since then, we have had twins and have accumulated enough stuff to fill our house twice. The garage was full of children’s toys, out-grown clothes, seasonal dishes, art supplies, bikes, strollers, etc.
In the past months leading up to the move, we took several hundred pounds of stuff to the Wesley Mission Center, had a garage sale and moved items into a storage unit.
Now, the new house. It is a larger house, but we will be living with my parents. They have lived in their current residence 35 years. They have every nook and cranny and closet stuffed with stuff. My mother has weeded out over the years since my brother and I left home, but she has since had 5 grandchildren they have bought stuff for. Both my parents have home offices. They have tons of stuff too.
We are now in the new house. Since the move, I have taken several more loads to the Wesley Mission Center and Kid to Kid resale. There are 3 storage units packed full and there are many boxes and bags in the garage to be unpacked. It is a slow process, but I am trying to get rid of more than I bring in.
It is amazing the amount of “stuff” we accumulate. We tell ourselves we need it, or we might need it. We save it, we store it, we buy bigger houses or rent storage units for it. We can’t let go. This clutter is material, but it is also mental, emotional and spiritual.
Clutter is almost a life style. Why is that?
There are many reasons why we accumulate clutter in our houses, in our cars, in our offices, in our minds. One is the very real fact of not enough. Not enough time to put things away; not enough places for the things to go. Not enough quiet to listen; not enough energy to do. Some of us are busy; some of us are very busy; some of us are too busy. We don’t have enough time and we don’t have enough space, literally and figuratively, and so our lives become very cluttered. Clutter is our life style. We may not like it but it feels as though it is here to stay.
In addition to the outside forces bringing clutter into our lives, it also serves some very real needs and some very real purposes. Many of us have a need for security, or a need for comfort, or a need for abundance. In order to fill that need we surround ourselves with things because they seem to make us feel safe and rich. How much comfort, or security, or power, or freedom do you take from your clutter?
Sometimes we can use clutter as a distraction from what we want to avoid. When I was discussing this topic with a friend, she said “ How else would we keep from getting necessary work done? Where else could you lose yourself, your time and important items like keys?” If we’re constantly losing things and spending time looking for them for instance, it becomes a lot easier not to have time for that difficult conversation or that difficult task. Sometimes we can use clutter as a barrier, or protection from other people and even from life itself.
Sometimes clutter prevents us from moving on with our lives. Our self-identity is bound up with our clutter. All those items we have a sentimental attachment to. All those items from people no longer with us, from our past.
Clutter serves many purposes and fills many needs. And you thought you just didn’t know what to do with your stuff!
Some of us treat our propensity for cluttering as though it was a moral failing, or at least a personality flaw, or something to be confessed with an embarrassed smile. We look upon the organized with envy and longing. In our “informal” culture we have assigned a certain morality to clutter. We can buy into attitudes like a messy desk is a sign of a messy mind, or a cluttered house is a dirty house. (Of course then one asks, what does an empty desk say about the mind?) But clutter is even more complex than all of this. On the personal, even cultural level, it is more than simply negative traits or habits. Indeed, the negative connotations get in the way of really looking at clutter and understanding the roles it plays in our lives.
What happens if we stop beating ourselves up because we have clutter and instead uncover what that clutter means? What do we learn about ourselves? Might we find a way to manage it, live with it, get rid of it? There’s something to be said for keeping the clutter under control – physically as well as spiritually and emotionally.
My life is very full. It bulges with many people, many tasks, many demands. That’s okay–I like it that way. However, because it is such, I want the places I live and work in to be non-cluttered. I need not to have every surface covered because I need to look around and see empty space. I am able to be more creative in an uncluttered environment. I need to have things in relative order because I appreciate the calmness of that. That has a spiritual importance to me. My outward surroundings both influence and mirror my inner landscape. I’m happy.
Clutter is like a river stirred up by a hurricane. For some time after the water looks brown, as the mud from the bottom has been disturbed and swirls closer to the surface. Un-cluttering is the calming; the settling of the mud to the depths again, restoring clearness to the surface of the water. It’s a meditation.
And it’s not only spiritual. Mentally, when I’m not overwhelmed by clutter I feel a certain order, a sense of being on top of things. I feel a creative efficiency. Creative and efficient. My thoughts flow and I am engaged.
Emotionally, clutter can be a hindrance to relationships, while de-cluttering can help to maintain them. Often one person really minds it when the other leaves his/her stuff all over the common areas. It can feel disrespectful of shared areas and a disregard of what is important. I mean “stuff” both literally and figuratively here. It’s hard to be present for others if you’re crammed completely full of your own self. Physical, mental, emotional clutter can eat away at relationships.
Is our self-identity bound up with our things? Do we use them to hold onto the past, or a past self? Does our clutter distract us from something we want to avoid? Does it protect us from others getting too close? Does it give us a sense of abundance, of security? Is it comforting? Does it offer a sense of power and freedom?
What does your clutter say about you? What do you want it to say?
Giving it up gives us room to fill our lives with more important things and relationships. I cannot tell you how free I feel now that I have the things I love and can find and use them. I have time to spend with my family and with God, because I don’t have to keep up with my clutter. I can create and be the person God created me to be because I am not a slave to cleaning up and organizing the clutter. My mind is cleared and is open for more time in prayer and solitude. My self-worth is not tied up in material things.
I have given that up.
And I am free.
Thanks be to God!!
